Reason #6: The Oregon Ducks

Nobody likes the Ducks. And it's not just because they frequently have a football team that wins a lot of games. There's just something about them and the way they get Nike money poured into their school, causing all their fans to think that they're the greatest thing since bacon-wrapped meatloaf. Or it could be their easily loatheable mascot. On top of that, they - hang on, there's a really bright light or something, I don't know what it is, but - AAAH MY EYESWhew - good thing that wasn't a bigger picture or I might have permanent retinal damage.

Anyways, the Ducks recently were responsible for costing the Huskies a shot at the national title, and Seattle one of its best shots at the championship it is doomed never to have. You know the year - the 2000 season, the run to the Rose Bowl where they stomped Purdue, Marques Tuiasosopo's elevation from Seattle sports minor deity into full-fledged god. The one loss in that otherwise charmed season was at the hands of the Phil Knight Ducks. The Huskies were down 7 with the ball with 2 minutes to go, and were obviously going to drive the length of the field to score and then win in overtime. But the normally unflappable Tuiasosopo, clearly disoriented by the giant haze of marijuana smoke floating in from Eugene's many hippie camps, threw 4 straight incompletions to seal the loss. And that was that.


Put duck legs, skin sides up, on rack of a broiler pan, then pour 1 cup water into bottom of pan. Brush or spoon about half of glaze over skin side of duck. Roast duck until well browned, about 20 minutes. Turn on broiler. Brush duck with remaining glaze, then broil 3 to 4 inches from heat until skin is bubbling and lightly charred around edges, about 2 minutes more. Keep warm, covered.

Bitter? Me? Naaaaaaah.